As many authors state here (and not only here), “writing is about lowering stakes.” So this is the post depicting that principle: a short and seems-like-about-nothing note that serves the bigger purpose: getting me back in contact with my inner author and my outer audience.
Let me confess: I started writing a book around 2 years ago. It’s been a never-ending fair of fucking procrastination, to say the least. I’ve been beating myself for that, but rarely could ensure stable progress on that journey. Sure, I gathered tons of notes in my physical notebook: about the lore, characters, possible events, etc. At some point this spring, I even sat down and wrote:
the synopsis
the first 2 chapters
It took me a couple of sessions to do so, hence I thought “hey, I’m gaining a momentum, nice.” And then I dropped again — oh, irony.
It’s not that I’m complaining, no. I’m just stating a fact that I’m a human being who suffers from executive dysfunction (that’s a fancy way of describing my autistic ADHD), so I’m very prone to procrastination. However, I’m blessed to have gifted people around me who inspire me to the brim! To the point of pushing forward, no matter how concerned I might be about myself.
This exact note’s the result of their positive affection on me. It feels good, reads to the point, and makes some of my thoughts exist — it basically ticks all the boxes of pleasant writing. Thanks for reading this. And yes, feel free to share in comments if you’ve ever beaten yourself for a never-ending project like I did :) You’re not alone with such hard feelings, so let’s pat each other’s backs in the comments.
P.S. I do hope to post more fiction in this blog, but I can’t demand that I always deliver fiction, even as I’m tempted to discipline myself as such. Such strict discipline measures never were efficient in my life for longer than 1-2 weeks, so it’s time to switch to another flow. So bear with me, I’ll keep adding notes like this.
Hello from one more person beating themselves up for their never ending second book 📕